Losing Hope

Content Warning: This section of the guide discusses suicide, incest, and sexual abuse of children and minors.

From the very first scene in the novel, Holder struggles with controlling his urge toward violence. As his story progresses, his violent tendencies—compounded by his grief once Les is dead—serve as a cornerstone of his character development. At first, his trauma ties directly into his violent responses to stress and anger. Chapter 1 begins in medias res as Holder confronts Les’s cheating boyfriend, Grayson, admitting that he “slides[s] his hands into the back pockets of [his] jeans” (1), hoping that he can stop himself from hitting Grayson. He holds off until Grayson makes a comment as Holder prepares to leave, and then he just can’t help himself. From the beginning, it’s clear that Holder is a character who feels the need to protect the people he loves and part of that “protection” comes in the form of physical aggression when Holder feels that someone he loves is threatened. The gendered dynamics of the male presentation of “protection” in the form of aggression go largely unquestioned in the novel, but the figure of Sky’s father does present an example of violence that destroys the lives of several women.