18 pages 36 minutes read

Thomas Hardy

Ah, Are You Digging on My Grave

Fiction | Poem | Adult | Published in 1913

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Themes

The Fleeting Nature of Human Relationships

The dominant theme that runs throughout the poem is that all human relationships are ephemeral: The finality of death severs even the most passionate connections.

The poem’s structure reinforces this theme by featuring a different type of relationship in each stanza: romance (Stanza 1), family ties (Stanza 2), a rivalry (Stanza 3), and an owner/pet dynamic (Stanzas 4-6). While these relationships appear to be very different in terms of type and degree of intimacy, they are shown to mirror each other. After death brings the speaker’s connections to an abrupt end, the still-living treated even the memory of the deceased flippantly. The speaker’s beloved in the first stanza replaces her, marrying another woman for being “One of the brightest wealth has bred” (Line 4) and justifying his transfer of affections by reasoning that it is impossible to betray someone who is no longer living. The speaker’s family—her “nearest dearest kin” (Line 8)—are likewise eager to move on from her death, neglecting her gravesite because they believe that tending to the grave and leaving fresh flowers there as commemoration is a waste of their time and effort, since “No tendance of her mound can loose / Her spirit from Death’s gin” (Lines 11-12).

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